Dilip's Dimension - Indian Humor: Jokes People Have E-Mailed Me

Pyaarey Puttar,

Good bless you. I am writing this letter slow because I

know you can't read fast. We don't live where we

did when you left home. Your dad read in the

newspaper that most accidents happen 20 miles

from your home, so we moved! I won't be able to

give you the address as the last sardar who stayed

in this house took the numbers with them for their

next house, so they wouldnt have to change their

address.

This place is really nice. It even has a washing
machine. I'm not sure it works too well, last week
I put in three shirts and pulled the chain and I
HAVE NOT SEEN THEM SINCE.

THE weather here isn't too bad. It rained only twice
last week. The first it rained for three days and the
second time for four days. The coat you wanted me
to send you, your aunt said it would be a little too
heavy to send in the mail with all the buttons, so we
cut them off and put them in the pocket.

We got another bill from the funeral home. It said
that if we don't make the last payment on
GRANDMA'S FUNERAL, she will come up again.
Your father has another job. He has 500 men under
him. He is cutting the grass in the cemetery. Your
sister had a baby this morning, I havent found out
whether it is a boy or girl, so I don't know whether
you are an aunt or uncle!

Your uncle jatindar fell into a whiskey vat. Some
men tried to pull him out, but he fought them off
and drowned. We cremated him and he burned for
3 days.

Three of your friends went off the bridge in a
pick-up truck. One was driving and the other two
were in the back. the driver got out, he rolled down
the window and swam to safety. the other 2 friends
drowned because they couldn't get the gate down.

there isn't much more news at this time. nothing
much has happened.

love, mom

p.s. i was going to send you some money, but the envelope was already sealed.